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| = The Media Project =
| | My forties (and the tail end of my thirties) are for practical things, for building core memories with family and friends, and for building a sense of home. Let creativity be a small part of it. |
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| I probably won't name it "Gynergy". I just had the URL. But maybe I will?
| | =To Do= |
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| == Target Reader ==
| | When you don’t have a realistic plan, you end up working inefficiently, which means you end up overworking. |
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| === Primary Traits ===
| | What are all the ways I am overworking? |
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| '''The target reader is a college-educated, middle-class Millennial woman.'''
| | =Routine= |
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| She has had experiences with '''entitled and manipulative men''', including sexual harassment, potentially coercion and manipulation in relationships, and intellectual dismissal. She may be at various stages of "waking up" about this: recognizing that what happened was wrong, recognizing that it didn't happen in a vacuum, getting out of the "benefit of the doubt" mentality with an abuser, etc.
| | Daily: |
| | * 9am Wake up, bathroom, light breakfast, walk to water and back |
| | * 10:30am 2h Sophos, some seated and some floor, with exercises |
| | * 1pm Lunch, nap |
| | * 2:30pm Tea, 2h other stuff |
| | * 5:30pm Free for friends, etc |
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| She is missing a coherent theory of male entitlement and manipulation that would explain her life experiences. Or, she remembers when it was missing, and she understands its importance.
| | Weekday Stuff: Always includes time for gentle thinking on the topic. |
| | * Monday: Gentle IFS and exploring tools for scrolling behavior |
| | * Tuesday and Wednesday: Health and Patient Advocacy People |
| | * Thursday: FinOps People, Idealist Tech Career People, or Budgeting |
| | * Friday: ModCon Women’s Group |
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| She may be a '''recovering people-pleaser'''.
| | Weekends Only: |
| | * Weekend time only: Writing my short story or my politics timeline project |
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| She is '''uncomfortable with the oversexualization of women in culture''', but isn't sure how to address it.
| | ==This Month: Do Things Moderately :) == |
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| She wants to talk about these things with other women like her, but not as part of an "exploited woman / helper organization" structure.
| | Consistently show up 2h/day at Sophos (time/effort) |
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| She is '''analytical''', although she may not call herself that, partly because it sounds 'unfeminine'. She wants information that helps her understand the complex root of problems that directly affect her life.
| | Find comfortable adaptations and correct biomechanics for mildly wearing out my muscles (time/effort) |
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| She cares a lot about '''politics''', but may not have found her feet for becoming politically engaged. She considers herself a bridge-builder and values respectful dialogue. She may identify as progressive because of their reputation for promoting gender equality and freedoms for women. She may identify as conservative due to their reputation for promoting family life, sex-based rights, and protections for children. She has reservations about the behavior of both parties. There may be one side that she considers to be the real enemy, and the other side that she considers to be basically good but in need of reform.
| | Learn about bunion health and try different shoes |
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| She is concerned about the '''well-being of children''' because of issues like online porn and gender ideology. If she has children, this is probably a primary driver for her. If she doesn't have children, it is probably a secondary driver.
| | Get into a turkey burger routine (time/effort) |
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| She likes learning about '''women's power, intellect, and creative achievement across time and culture'''. Women's history, philosophy, literature, art.
| | Get into a comfortable and convenient vegetable routine |
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| She has had at least one significant experience with '''creepy leftist capture in her intellectual, professional, or values-based networks'''. This could be in a political group, at church, at a university, at work, in social justice advocacy, an arts community, etc. She may have also had experiences with conservative capture or "anti-woke left" capture.
| | Seek support for internet scrolling issue |
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| She wants to process this stuff with other women who get it, but she doesn't want to go deep into anger or obsession.
| | Go to St. Pete Pier Pumpkin Patch and Gallagher’s Pumpkins & Christmas Trees |
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| , and the promotion of sex work and hookup culture. She also has reservations about conservative leadership in regard to women's rights.
| | ===Next…=== |
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| She may have a complicated relationship with her church of origin, whether or not she is still a member of the church. She is interested in discussing faith and theology with women who are members of other religions.
| | Do Phillips heart monitor |
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| She considers herself a '''gay ally''', or may be gay herself. She supports people who don't fit into gender norms, but she is troubled by the aggressive push for inclusion of trans-identified males in women's sports, changing rooms, etc.
| | Do mail in labs |
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| She strives to not spend her life on the Internet, and prefers face-to-face connection.
| | Pursue imaging for my ankle |
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| The magazine provides a vision for the life our reader wants.
| | Listen to a couple chapters of IFS book (time/effort) |
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| We also strategize about to solve the problems we all see happening. However, we do this from a base vision of a life that is already pretty good. Our aspirational reader is not in crisis, but she does see problems and wants to help solve them.
| | Interview two lawyers (time/effort) |
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| I want to avoid the crisis mindset. Women who aren't in crisis are driven away by a crisis mindset, and women who ''are'' in crisis get worse when immersed in it. A "good life" environment will be familiar for women who aren't in crisis, and healing for women who are.
| | Clear out guest bedroom for Mom; switch bed and treadmill (time/effort) |
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| ==== A Note On Abortion ====
| | Do first ModCon women’s meetup (time/effort) |
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| For many politically active women, abortion is a very intense subject, and they prioritize it above all. This is true on both sides of the abortion line. In this media project, we treat abortion as a "compassion topic" and seek to create understanding across the line. This means we will lose all of the women who care about abortion (on either side) more than they care about our driving forces. For political activism, if we go there, we will lose all political networks that require loyalty to a stance on abortion. These things will define our niche to some degree. It makes us smaller, but it lets us serve a group of women who are currently underserved.
| | Go to comedy night (time/effort) |
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| === Secondary Traits ===
| | Find source to buy zucchini / summer squash seeds |
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| She wants to process this stuff with other women who get it, but she doesn't want to go deep into anger or obsession.
| | ==Next Month== |
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| She is troubled by certain behaviors of feminist organizations: the aggressive push for inclusion of trans-identified males, and the promotion of sex work and hookup culture. She also has reservations about conservative leadership in regard to women's rights.
| | Stabilize my health habits |
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| She may have a complicated relationship with her church of origin, whether or not she is still a member of the church. She is interested in discussing faith and theology with women who are members of other religions.
| | Deepen in Biomechanics |
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| She considers herself a gay ally, or may be gay herself.
| | Pursue advanced medical care |
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| She strives to not spend her life on the Internet, and prefers face-to-face connection.
| | Run ModCon women’s group |
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| == Our Network ==
| | Lose a lot of weight (effort) |
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| Maintain OUR OWN center of gravity.
| | Get pretty good at FinOps |
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| I don't want the people in St Pete to feel like this "came from the internet", or is Internetty. But I do need to tell them about FDS and Nina Paley.
| | Get house set up for housemate |
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| Maintain just enough of a presence in online spaces that the women who are there can find us. Argue with them on Twitter; converse with them on Substack; be a guest on their podcast. But, maintain OUR OWN center of gravity that is elsewhere.
| | Pursue justice |
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| There are wonderful, brilliant, politically informed women who are socially isolated because of creepy leftist capture in intellectual and political networks.
| | See Ocala family on holidays |
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| Conservative and "anti-woke liberal" spaces are also captured in different ways. All of these spaces are fundamentally captured by male interests.
| | Do some art and post it on social media |
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| Places to maintain a presence:
| | ==Don’t Overwork: Don’t Spend Effort On These Now== |
| - Anti-woke networks
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| - Feminist networks
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| - Conservative women's networks
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| - Arts and literature networks
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| - Religious networks?
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| == Purpose of the Project ==
| | After stabilizing at Sophos, pursuing justice, and getting house set up: Become a decent thing doer for a few lawyers or doctors |
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| I had several friends and authors who helped me see politics and culture in a new way, when I was making the journey from non-politically-active progressive loyalist to sort-of-politically-active nonpartisan feminist. I'd like to do a knowledge dump of all of that, plus other topics that I think will be relevant for that audience.
| | =Health= |
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| I love history, and would like to include a lot of content on the history of women and our political projects.
| | [[Appt Notes]] |
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| I'm also including mental health, mindfulness, and physical health as a topic, because a lot of women involved in this stuff need that.
| | [[Leg Pain]] |
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| When I write naturally, it comes out a little bit silly, so I want to lean into that when it's appropriate (ie not on highly emotional or dark topics).
| | ==Inner Wellness== |
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| = History: How Does Change Happen? What's Happening Next? =
| | IFS |
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| [[A History of Women, Gay People, and Gender-Diverse People in American Politics]]
| | ==Food== |
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| [[Side Trip: Aristasia]] | | [[List of foods to remind me of variety]] |
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| = Current Events = | | ==Adaptive Devices== |
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| = Politics: Who's Doing What, and How You Can Help Them =
| | [[Biomechanics and Movement]] |
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| === [[Civics, Institutional Power, and Social Change]] ===
| | [[Bunions]] |
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| https://xkcd.com/1028/
| | ===Home Environment=== |
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| ==== Understanding Institutional Capture ====
| | [[Active Sitting / Ergonomics]] |
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| ==== Nonpartisan Feminism ====
| | [[Sunlight Computer]] |
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| Most of the ideas in here come from / were heavily inspired by Natasha Chart's book, Practical Politics for Bold Women. Buy it here! - https://chartconsulting.samcart.com/products/practical-politics-for-bold-women
| | ==Misc== |
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| What is the solution to capture of feminism by the left, and the possibility of future capture of women's organizations by the right? I think the best defense is small, fiercely independent women's organizations that know how to collaborate across ideological lines, but also are structured so that they can withdraw support, without incurring damage, when their needs are no longer being met by an old coalition.
| | [[Airway]] |
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| Whatever network you are part of, they should feel like they have to be on their toes a little bit, because if they no longer hold up their end of the bargain, women's groups can walk away.
| | [[Leaky Gut]] |
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| This also goes for organizing for LGB people and gender-diverse people.
| | =Better Blood= |
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| = Social Issues =
| | [[Legal Justice]] |
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| Child Safeguarding
| | [[Better Blood]] |
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| Domestic Violence and Sexual Violence
| | =FinOps= |
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| Commercial Sexual Exploitation
| | Once I am at the next level in my career and highly employable, explore routes to land jobs at places that satisfy the political do-gooder side of myself, and that offers me the same pay, benefits, and career security as private industry. This is a moonshot: the one that makes sense for me to do. |
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| ==Women's Status:==
| | Life is short and hard even for the most fortunate of us. And that’s why, whatever you have chosen to work on, it has to be worthy of your time here. Because if you have any success at all, it will take up at least a decade of your life. And if you’re really lucky, you get to work on it for multiple decades. |
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| In Public Spaces
| | I stopped by Austin for the FinOpsX conference, an amazing little thing put on by … maybe the Linux Foundation through some other community community, idk. |
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| In the Workplace
| | Anyway, it was really amazing. Open source is just so much fun, I’m really glad that I found it all those years ago. This conference was smallish, like 400 people, but had all the open source vibes that the Drupal scene had back in the day, or the Python scene had the only time I dipped my toes in a few years back. |
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| Financial Status
| | John Grubb |
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| Public Leadership
| | Whatever you need to help you feel successful is helpful to get you to the place of being successful, as long as you don’t confuse it with success itself. |
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| Church
| | https://www.ignoredbydinosaurs.com/posts/success |
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| | I work with a guy. He’s incredibly smart. He’s the seniormost developer here, and if you need to learn something new and get something large done, he’s the guy to do it. We basically dropped him off in the AWS jungle and told him to learn Hadoop and the entire Hadoop ecosystem for a data warehouse project and he did it. |
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| | I work with another guy. He’s also incredibly smart. But he asks me for the answer before attempting to find it on his own more often than not. He’s got a point when he says “it’s a lot faster for me to just ask you rather than spend time trying to find it on my own”, because he’s here to do a job after all. I get that. But the best analogy I can come up with is a spin on the old adage - |
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| == Compassion Topics ==
| | You can give a man a fish, and he eats for a day. You can teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime. |
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| [[Abortion]]
| | There’s a third kind of person, though - the person who goes out and finds out about fishing on their own and then teaches themselves how to fish. This person will be your boss, and will always be employed. |
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| [[Saving Democracy]]
| | =Finance = |
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| [[How Are Women And Men The Same, And How Are We Different?]] | | [[Finance]] |
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| = [[Personal Strength]] = | | =Sparkle House= |
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| == Mindfulness ==
| | [[Sparkle House]] |
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| == Behavioral Health and Good Habits == | | =Friends= |
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| THESE - Temperature, Hydration, Eating, Sleeping, Exercise
| | [[Friends]] |
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| I made up this acronym during a time when I was *not* doing well, and I'm still proud of it.
| | = Other = |
| | [[Places In St Pete]] |
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| Originally I used THESE BFUP, where THESE is physical stuff and BFUP is higher-level stuff. BFUP is Belonging, Fun, Unwinding, and Purpose. It's supposed to be pronounced "beef up", as in "These beef up your health and wellness!" I decided it was more memorable just as THESE.
| | [[Old Front Page]] |
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| === My checklist ===
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| First, I go through the THESE checklist:
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| '''Temperature''': Is it too warm or cold where I am?
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| '''Hydration''': Do I need a glass of water, other beverage, or watery food?
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| I like water, but if you don't, you don't have to drink water. There's nothing magical about water that exists in a glass by itself. The water in diet root beer is the same water. Just watch out for sugar and caffeine.
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| You can also get water from eating fruit, but that's a slippery slope, because the water in the fruit is also used by your body to help digest the fruit, so you're getting less for hydration.
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| There is a melon that contains a lot of water. I'll leave it to you to guess which melon it is.
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| '''Eating''': Have I eaten a moderate amount of healthy food today?
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| '''Sleeping''': Have I slept enough?
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| '''Exercise''': Have I gone on a nice walk, done some yoga, gone on a fun bike ride?
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| == Boundaries and "Winning Therapy" ==
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| == Trauma Healing ==
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| == Physical Health ==
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| [[Healthy Skincare: Sunscreen, Makeup, Soap]] | |
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| [[Health Tips For Fat Ladies]]
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| == Financial Health ==
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| === [[Low-Effort Backyard Gardening in Central Florida]] ===
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| == Social Health ==
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| How To Meet Friends Who Share Your Values
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| How To Navigate Friendships Across Ideological Lines
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| == Spiritual Health ==
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| [[Temp Link]]
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| = [[Faith and Theology]] =
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| [[Women and the Major World Religions]]
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| [[Commentary on the Divine Feminine from the Major World Religions]]
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| [[Perennialism]]
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| [[Prehistoric Religion]]
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| [[Deanism and Filianism]]
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| [[An Atheist Lesbian Desister's Favorite Catholic Takes on Gender Ideology]]
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| ebony.clayton@yahoo.com - interview her!
| |
My forties (and the tail end of my thirties) are for practical things, for building core memories with family and friends, and for building a sense of home. Let creativity be a small part of it.
To Do
When you don’t have a realistic plan, you end up working inefficiently, which means you end up overworking.
What are all the ways I am overworking?
Routine
Daily:
- 9am Wake up, bathroom, light breakfast, walk to water and back
- 10:30am 2h Sophos, some seated and some floor, with exercises
- 1pm Lunch, nap
- 2:30pm Tea, 2h other stuff
- 5:30pm Free for friends, etc
Weekday Stuff: Always includes time for gentle thinking on the topic.
- Monday: Gentle IFS and exploring tools for scrolling behavior
- Tuesday and Wednesday: Health and Patient Advocacy People
- Thursday: FinOps People, Idealist Tech Career People, or Budgeting
- Friday: ModCon Women’s Group
Weekends Only:
- Weekend time only: Writing my short story or my politics timeline project
This Month: Do Things Moderately :)
Consistently show up 2h/day at Sophos (time/effort)
Find comfortable adaptations and correct biomechanics for mildly wearing out my muscles (time/effort)
Learn about bunion health and try different shoes
Get into a turkey burger routine (time/effort)
Get into a comfortable and convenient vegetable routine
Seek support for internet scrolling issue
Go to St. Pete Pier Pumpkin Patch and Gallagher’s Pumpkins & Christmas Trees
Next…
Do Phillips heart monitor
Do mail in labs
Pursue imaging for my ankle
Listen to a couple chapters of IFS book (time/effort)
Interview two lawyers (time/effort)
Clear out guest bedroom for Mom; switch bed and treadmill (time/effort)
Do first ModCon women’s meetup (time/effort)
Go to comedy night (time/effort)
Find source to buy zucchini / summer squash seeds
Next Month
Stabilize my health habits
Deepen in Biomechanics
Pursue advanced medical care
Run ModCon women’s group
Lose a lot of weight (effort)
Get pretty good at FinOps
Get house set up for housemate
Pursue justice
See Ocala family on holidays
Do some art and post it on social media
Don’t Overwork: Don’t Spend Effort On These Now
After stabilizing at Sophos, pursuing justice, and getting house set up: Become a decent thing doer for a few lawyers or doctors
Health
Appt Notes
Leg Pain
Inner Wellness
IFS
Food
List of foods to remind me of variety
Adaptive Devices
Biomechanics and Movement
Bunions
Home Environment
Active Sitting / Ergonomics
Sunlight Computer
Misc
Airway
Leaky Gut
Better Blood
Legal Justice
Better Blood
FinOps
Once I am at the next level in my career and highly employable, explore routes to land jobs at places that satisfy the political do-gooder side of myself, and that offers me the same pay, benefits, and career security as private industry. This is a moonshot: the one that makes sense for me to do.
Life is short and hard even for the most fortunate of us. And that’s why, whatever you have chosen to work on, it has to be worthy of your time here. Because if you have any success at all, it will take up at least a decade of your life. And if you’re really lucky, you get to work on it for multiple decades.
I stopped by Austin for the FinOpsX conference, an amazing little thing put on by … maybe the Linux Foundation through some other community community, idk.
Anyway, it was really amazing. Open source is just so much fun, I’m really glad that I found it all those years ago. This conference was smallish, like 400 people, but had all the open source vibes that the Drupal scene had back in the day, or the Python scene had the only time I dipped my toes in a few years back.
John Grubb
Whatever you need to help you feel successful is helpful to get you to the place of being successful, as long as you don’t confuse it with success itself.
https://www.ignoredbydinosaurs.com/posts/success
I work with a guy. He’s incredibly smart. He’s the seniormost developer here, and if you need to learn something new and get something large done, he’s the guy to do it. We basically dropped him off in the AWS jungle and told him to learn Hadoop and the entire Hadoop ecosystem for a data warehouse project and he did it.
I work with another guy. He’s also incredibly smart. But he asks me for the answer before attempting to find it on his own more often than not. He’s got a point when he says “it’s a lot faster for me to just ask you rather than spend time trying to find it on my own”, because he’s here to do a job after all. I get that. But the best analogy I can come up with is a spin on the old adage -
You can give a man a fish, and he eats for a day. You can teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime.
There’s a third kind of person, though - the person who goes out and finds out about fishing on their own and then teaches themselves how to fish. This person will be your boss, and will always be employed.
Finance
Finance
Sparkle House
Sparkle House
Friends
Friends
Other
Places In St Pete
Old Front Page